Merry Christmas…I think

 

I had sorta planned to do an audio entry, is that a podcast even if it’s only one entry? Not sure why I didn’t other than  just pure laziness. I’ve just had ZERO ambition.

I’ve had to power knit a scarf for my dad, Fisherman rib. Started it yesterday, finished it after lunch today. Umm, I don’t wanna see ribbing for a year now.

he’s also getting the log cabin slipper/socks I made him. He has until the end of January to start wearing them before I ask for them back. This will be the second pair of log cabins I’ve wasted my time on that hasn’t been worn which is why I no longer knit for anybody but myself.

Christmas dinner menu had changed several times to the point I want to eat a bowl of cheerios. If I knew this is how it was going to be I would have ordered my fucking sushi. Everybody is trying to be so goddamned accommodating to me…if they want to be so fucking accommodating to me…..TAKE ME TO NEW YORK FOR CHRISTMAS! THAT is what I want. For the past twenty five fucking years I’ve wanted to spend a holiday ‘home’ in Manhattan but I guess people don’t want to be THAT accommodating, eh? Just accommodating enough so that it doesn’t put them out. Typical of a fucking New Englander. They’re all so ‘open-minded’ so long as your views mesh with theirs. Another wish for many years was to spend ushering in New Years at the Rainbow Room…..think that’s gonna happen in this lifetime? So I’m stuck in this hell hole eating pork (my dad eats FAR too much fucking meat) when I wanted sushi and wishing more than anything I was home where I could walk through the park and take a walk down any street and find some interesting place to pop into. 

Which somehow leads me to missing my circle so much and wishing time could reverse itself so I could spend one more weekend with them. I wonder where “O” is and if he’s buried his demons-I worry. And what “R” is up to and how his daughter must be a knock-out by now. I wonder if “B” is still as crazy as ever and how it’d be so great to throw on some Tesla, crack open a couple bottles of suds and sit back and let the good times roll with “J”-I wonder if he still likes Tesla? And I wonder most about the one with the eyes, who never quite got into the circle…I wonder what “D” is doing right this very minute? Where he’s at in life, if he’s happy and being treated right. I miss you buddy and hope you’re ok. I’d still love to knock back a couple beers and shoot some pinball with you….you’d probably whip my ass since I’ve not played pinball in 16 years.

This entry is really rather prickly, that’s how my mind feels right now, it’s not very pleasant.Not pleasant at all. The climate of the world needs to go back to the way it was in the late 70’s and 80’s. We were so much better off then-as a society and a nation.

Anyway….Merry Christmas  and to “D”,  Merry Christmas wherever you are. I wish we could go hang at a show-Maiden would be fun.